MLB PLAYOFFS: TAGUCHI! (GESUNDHEIT)

By the way, if you went to bed last night before the end of the Mets-Cardinals game, and then woke up with a strange feeling, it has nothing to do with So Taguchi's sudden home run power.

Joe Buck, the whitest guy alive, used the word "ho" on the air last night. While signing off after the Cardinals beat the Mets 9-6 to level the National League championship series at a game apiece, Joe freaking Buck said, "Hey, ho... we'll see you in St. Louis," over the strains of The Ramones' Blitzkrieg Bop.

Gabba gabba we, gabba gabba hey, Joey Ramone must be spinning in his grave today.

That's neither here nor there, though.

The Cardinals, the 83-win Cardinals, could conceivably win the NL pennant without even having to return to Shea Stadium. Now that would be too bad for us Blue Jays fans who would like to see Carlos Delgado play in World Series, so much for sentimentality (and last night at least, the Mets relief pitching).

Everyone was so smug about a Mets romp, and they make it take it in five games yet, but Thomas Boswell's column in today's Washington Post points out that the baseball gods may have decided to throw Cardinals manager Tony La Russa a frickin' bone: "After a managerial lifetime as an overdog, La Russa finally has an underdog club with a chance to be the people's choice."

Long story short: La Russa's always been the genius manager whose teams have had that unfortunate knack for being on the wrong side of baseball history.

• His favoured Cardinals were swept by the Red Sox in the 2004 World Series;
• The '96 Cards blew a 3-1 NLCS lead against the Braves, getting outscored 32-1 in the final three games
• In '92, his A's committed the biggest collapse in ALCS history, blowing a five-run lead in Game 4 against the Blue Jays, who went on to win in six
• The A's were swept by the Reds the 1990 World Series... no team had ever won as few regular-season games as the Reds (91) and swept the Series.
• Two words: Kirk Gibson

As for the ALCS, where the Tigers put a chill into the A's yesterday, winning 3-0 to move within a game of the Olde English D's first Series trip since 1984. Associate Blogger Neil Acharya, by the way, is the Prediction King. Neil called Tigers left-fielder Craig Monroe for ALCS MVP, and he's gone 4-for-10 with four runs scored, a homer and three RBI. If he gets a hit or two today and the Tigers finish off Oakland, he'll get some MVP consideration.

Oh, and Delgado, Neil's pick for NLCS MVP, hit two homers last night in a losing cause.

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

TAKE A BOW, PIGSKIN PETE: AND OTHER FRIDAY NIGHT LEFTOVERS

First off, this morning's round-up must include a few kind words for Pigskin Pete, the Hamilton Tiger-Cats super fan who is hanging up his lucky bowler hat after tomorrow's final home game of the season.

Pigskin (AKA Paul Weiler, a retired Dofasco worker) has been leading cheers at Ticat games since the mid-'70s, with the familiar chant: Oskie wee wee! Oskie wa wa! Holy mackinaw! Tigers! Eat 'em raw!

It's a Hamilton tradition that began in the 1920s by the original Pigskin Pete, then was handed off to a successor before Weiler became Pigskin Pete III. Pigskin IV will be anointed next season.

Corny? Yes. An anachronism? Sure. Kitschy as all get out? Of course. That's the Canadian Football League for you. As has been argued here before, what makes the CFL great is that along with being a purer form of football, it still lets you have a little ironic detachment. The NFL has superfan-types too, but none who are so thoroughly part of the experience as Pigskin Pete, who actually stands on the field, is in Hamilton. He wasn't some exhibitionist trying to make ESPN; he is just a really enthusiastic guy who honestly loves football and doesn't mind trying to put a honest smile on people's faces.

There'll be another Pigskin, of course, but even Argos fans should appreciate this one.

Other CFL note: The game of the year to date might have come last night in Regina, when the Roughriders' Luca Congi kicked a field goal on the final play to beat the Montreal Alouettes 27-26. The game had nine lead changes -- three in the final 10 minutes -- and the Riders gutted out a crucial win despite missing their featured back, Kenton Keith, and their most dangerous wideout, Jason Armstead. Saskatchewan's rookie Canadian receiver Andy Fantuz, by the way, made a fingertip catch for a crucial fourth-quarter TD.

That win was a double-blue bonus. It helps the Argos' chances of finishing first in the East, and it also means the Edmonton Eskimos are all the more likely to miss the playoffs for the first time since 1972. Which really should get its own post.

OTHER BUSINESS

• Not such a good night for either of the "local" OHL teams for this blog -- the Ottawa 67's lost 5-3 to the Saginaw Spirit (which does have the entire Colbert Nation cheering for them), and the Kingston Frontenacs were drubbed 6-2 by the Guelph Storm. Ottawa suffered a much worse loss, though: First-line centre Logan Couture will miss a month with mononucleosis.
  
  That other team in Eastern Ontario, the Belleville Bulls, is quietly doing their thing. The Bulls won 3-2 in a shootout over Mississauga last night, taking over top spot in the East Division. Granted, it's early yet.
• CIS football picks are here. The flu outbreak at Mount Allison University means the Mounties-Saint Mary's Huskies game slated for last night had to be postponed. The most reasonable suggestion seems to be not to make up the game -- there's only two weeks left in the season -- and simply let all four Atlantic teams into the playoffs, instead of three.
• A high school running back in Arkansas scored 10 touchdowns last night -- and his team lost. The real kicker was that a couple people had benched him in their Arkansas high school fantasy football league.
• Minnesota Vikings fans don't need any reminder that this is the team's bye week, and we all know what happened last year, but Kissing Suzy Kolber made it hilarious. (Via Deadspin.)

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

SAVING OTTAWA SPORTS: SOMEONE ELSE WILL HAVE TO PLAY THE SAVIOUR, APPARENTLY

(Originally posted Friday, Oct. 13.)

A while back, Rogers Sportsnet's Ian Mendes penned a blog post that pondered whether Ottawa was Canada's worst sports town, and yours truly was a little over-the-top in attacking both the reasoning and regrettably, the man himself. That was unfortunate.

Ian extended a chance for rebuttal Thursday on Sportsnet.ca. General reaction was less than glowing, although someone with the screenname "Gayjock" was effusive in his praise. In this day and age, you're nothin' without a gay following, so thanks.

(The netizens on the "Unofficial" MJHL Web Post also noticed, allowing me to take a nostalgia trip back 2 1/2 years to when I covered the Manitoba Junior Hockey League for the Portage la Prairie Daily Graphic: "My 6 year old has a blog for frick sake," one commenter wrote.)

Sorry if I wasn't, to borrow one commenter's words, "the knight in shining armour" who proclaimed Ottawa to be the bestest sports town around, and everyone lived happily ever after, The End. This is real life, where people have adult opinions. And of course, Ian Mendes isn't the bad guy here. He's a journalist, trying to make a honest living like everyone else. It reflects poorly on me that I lost sight of that.

The basic argument was that it's time for people in Ottawa to move beyond the "Canada's worst sports town" debate. It's taken on the tone of Grade 9s arguing in the cafeteria. It never goes anywhere. That was my message then and it hasn't changed.

Who cares whether or not this is a better or worse sports town than any place else? Why does that matter? We live here, so let's focus on our sporting landscape.

Ottawa is a 'tweener city for sports. Is it is a big minor-league market, or a minor big-league market? Instead of dwelling on the failures, why not embrace having a little from Column A and a little from Column B?

This is a city can support a National Hockey League team. For sports, though, it has more in common with Hamilton, London, Kingston or Halifax than that certain city of 6 million people far too many people here have an inferiority complex toward.

With some more dedicated owners similar to Ottawa 67's owner Jeff Hunt, we could have a well-run CFL team and a minor-league baseball franchise (just not necessarily Triple-A) that gets healthy crowds. That would add to what's here with the Senators, the junior hockey club, the Ottawa Fury women's soccer team, and the various Carleton Ravens and Ottawa Gee-Gees varsity squads.

Bottom line: The best course of action is to quit dwelling on the "Canada's worst sports town" stigma and work with what we have to change that perception. OC Transpo doesn't include routes to Negative Town.

Don't be a "Why?" type, be a "Why Not?" There's far too few of the latter in this day and age, and not just in Ottawa.

Related:
We've Heard This Before... (Sept. 18), Stop Lamenting The Lynx Already (Sept. 6), Good Weekend For the Ravens And Gee-Gees (Sept. 4), Vote Of Confidence For City's Football Future (Aug. 10)

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

TORONTO SOCCER TEAM SLIPS THROUGH CRACKS, AND OTHER WEEKEND STUFF

Next stop, weekend (although some of us have to work):

• Little surprising that the media didn't go to town with the story about the Toronto Lynx soccer club dropping its professional team. This seemed tailor-made for the injustice file: The Lynx owners worked to build a team and a following, and now they're folding the tent since they know they don't have the cash or the clout that's behind Toronto FC, the MLS team that the Condo Builders (a.k.a. Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment) is bringing to T-Dot.
  
  Here you have one group that apparently really cared about developing soccer and Canadian players, and a group with more money that just wants to tighten its grip on the Toronto sports scene. Who knows why a bigger deal hasn't been made out of this, especially since some columnists live to rag on MLSE for its alleged high crimes and misdemeanors.
• Steagle Colbeagle the Eagle alert: The Saginaw Spirit are in Ottawa tonight to play the 67's. On Sunday, they take on my Kingston Frontenacs, who were apparently referenced on The Colbert Report the other night. Stephen Colbert said, "I don't know what a Frontenac is," and frankly, neither does anyone in Kingston. It's a world leader in confusing sports team names.
• The Frontenacs have found a goalie to partner with Daryl Borden. His name is Kevin Opsahl, and he's like a god skating amongst mere mortals. No, actually he's a 20-year-old overager who posted a 2.70 goals-against average last year with Lethbridge and Seattle of the Western Hockey League. That 2.70 GAA sounds good, although it was only 14th-best in the defensively-minded "Dub."
• Local note: The Carleton Ravens and Ottawa Gee-Gees men's basketball teams will play at Scotiabank Place on Jan. 23. Top ticket: $25. You can hear the wiseacres already: "Twenty-five dollars to watch Canadian university basketball? Can I count that as a charitable contribution on my income taxes?" This is Ottawa, after all.
  
  The Ravens play an exhibition tournament this weekend with games against New Brunswick (tonight, 8 p.m.), Windsor (Saturday, 8 p.m.) and Victoria (Sunday, 2 p.m.).
• Regular features: Saving Ottawa Sports, CIS football picks and NFL picks, courtesy yours truly and Associate Blogger Neil Acharya. Oh, and wouldn't Heisman Trophy hopeful Garrett Wolfe thrive in the CFL?

Have an average weekend. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

THE CFL'S NEXT GREAT BACK?

Reading all the Heisman hype about Northern Illinois' little big man Garrett Wolfe makes this football fan north of the border wonder: Is he the CFL's next great back?

Wolfe, all 5-foot-7 and 175 pounds or so of him, is averaging a sick 223.8 yards per game. That's more yards than most NCAA teams. He had 285 yards from scrimmage in the first game of the year against The Ohio State University.

The NFL's never been big, pardon the pun, on letting a little running back do his thing, unless he was a singular player such as Barry Sanders. Despite his small stature, Wolfe is a straight-ahead runner who hits it up between the tackles and uses his speed to get outside.

Imagine what he could do on the CFL's 65-yard wide field.
Winnipeg's Charles Roberts (5-foot-6, 175) is that kind of back. So is Calgary's Joffrey Reynolds, who's about 6-foot-3, 220.

The CFL has always been the place for the likes of Pinball Clemons and Gizmo Williams, who were always the smallest guys on the field, but could bob and weave through the entire punt team, then outrun them to the end zone.

Their gifts were wasted on the NFL and its killjoy coaches, who put more emphasis on concepts such as "ball security" and "north-south running." Why, if you let broken-field improv artists such as Pinball and the Giz play, fans might actually get excited. They might not need to binge-drink and compulsively gamble get through each NFL Sunday. Before long, breweries and liquor stores would close for a lack of business, the economy would start to falter... well, you see where this is going.

The NFL's attitude in this area is changing, albeit at a glacial pace. Getting back to Wolfe, there's more money to be made as a third-down or kick-return specialist in the NFL than as a featured back in the CFL, that's true. Those among us who appreciate the purer form of football that's played up here should point to Garrett Wolfe and say, "Now there's a prototype CFL running back."

Here's hoping that if the NFL doesn't work out, then Wolfe gets a chance in Canada and is open to pursuing that avenue. Go, Garrett, go.

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

LEAF LOSS LENDS ITSELF TO DEVIL-RELATED PUNS ON FRIDAY THE 13TH

FYI for those of you heading down to Port Dover for Friday the 13th biker bash: Just because Dwayne Roloson isn't there right now doesn't mean it's cool to park your Harley on the lawn of his summer house. It's reserved for Ducati riders.

• NHL: Devils 7 Maple Leafs 6 (shootout): So much for writing about how the Leafs were fasting wiping away the memory of last year. There's still going to be plenty of nights like this under new coach Paul Maurice, too, since the Leafs are awfully vulnerable on the back end. The Devils' Brian Gionta (pictured) scored three goals in the third period. It happens.
• NHL: Flames 1, Senators nada: Take heart, Sens fans. The boys showed some signs of life, trading hard hits with the Flames, whom the result probably flattered. Andrej Meszaros hit the crossbar early and Daniel Alfredsson fanned on his deke after turning Miikka Kiprusoff inside-out, and the Sens were once again hopeless on the power play. Change that, they beat a good team. By the way, how were reporters able to get quotes from Dennis Hamel, anyway? He's still in the air after that hit Dion Phaneuf put on him.
  
  The take-the-C-off Alfie movement seems to have lost some steam, not so much because of the captain, but because Mike Fisher's been rather quiet -- he hasn't even had a penalty through the first four games, let alone a point. Fisher better start playing with some more jam, for the Senators' sake.
• MLB playoffs: Mets 2 Cardinals 0: Hey, you in the Mets hat, lose the smirk and we'll lose it for you. Chris Carpenter is starting Game 2 tonight for the Cards against someone named John Maine.

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

NFL PICKS WEEK 6

Yes, Out of Left Field is obliged to provide weekly NFL picks that are guaranteed to be no more, or no less accurate than some of the various experts out there. These picks are for recreational use only, so don't come crying to us when you're 64 grand in the hole and they're threatening to take your thumbs. Associate Blogger Neil Acharya is also dispensing advice his week. All lines are from Bet US Sportsbook as of this morning. Oh, and check out the weekly CIS football picks, where Neate is having significantly better luck.

Sunday, 1 p.m.
CINCINNATI (-7) vs. TAMPA BAY (o/u 43)
Acharya: Bengals 28-7
Sager: Bengals 38-14
WINNER: Bucs 14-13

TENNESSEE (+10.5) vs. WASHINGTON (o/u 39)
Acharya: Redskins 20-14 (Titans cover)
Sager: Redskins 31-10
WINNER: Titans 25-22

HOUSTON (+13.5) vs. DALLAS (o/u 43)
Acharya: Cowboys 30-9
Sager: Cowboys 27-17 (Texans cover)
WINNER: Cowboys 34-6

BUFFALO (-1.5) vs. DETROIT (o/u 40.5)
Acharya: Bills 24-17
Sager: Bills 26-10
WINNER: Lions 20-17

SEATTLE (-3.5) vs. ST. LOUIS (o/u 44.5)
Acharya: Seahawks 25-24 (Rams cover)
Sager: Rams 27-23
WINNER: Seahawks 30-28 (Rams cover)

N.Y. GIANTS (+3) vs. ATLANTA (o/u 41.5)
Acharya: Falcons 24-10
Sager: Falcons 17-13
WINNER: Giants 27-14

PHILADELPHIA (-4.5) vs. NEW ORLEANS (o/u 46)
Acharya: Eagles 30-10
Sager: Eagles 23-21 (Saints cover)
WINNER: Saints 27-24

CAROLINA (+3) vs. BALTIMORE (o/u 33)
Acharya: Ravens 13-7
Sager: Panthers 20-10
WINNER: Panthers 23-21

Sunday, 4:15 p.m.
MIAMI (+2) vs. N.Y. JETS (o/u 36)
Acharya: Jets 21-13
Sager: Jets 23-10
WINNER: Jets 20-17

SAN DIEGO (-11.5) vs. SAN FRANCISCO (o/u 42.5)
Acharya: Chargers 35-10
Sager: Chargers 28-17 (49ers cover)
WINNER: Chargers 48-19

KANSAS CITY (+7) vs. PITTSBURGH (o/u 36.5)
Acharya: Steelers 20-17 (Chiefs cover)
Sager: Steelers 20-10
WINNER: Steelers 45-7

Sunday night
OAKLAND (+16) vs. DENVER (o/u 36)
Acharya: Broncos 21-7 (Raiders cover)
Sager: Broncos 31-10
WINNER: Broncos 13-3 (Raiders cover)

Monday night
CHICAGO (-13.5) vs. ARIZONA (o/u 39)
Acharya: Bears 38-0 (with a mini-Lovie Smith)
Sager: Bears 30-13
WINNER: Bears 24-23 ("They are who we thought they were")

Neil Acharya's season to date (missed Week 1)
26-29-1 (46%) ATS, 39-17 (70%) SU, 33-21-2 (61%) OVER/UNDER
Neate Sager's season to date
29-43 (40%) ATS, 44-28 (61%) SU, 38-32-2 (54%) OVER/UNDER

Previous:
NFL Picks Week 5 (Oct. 8)
NFL Picks Week 4 (Sept. 28)

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

CIS FOOTBALL PICKS WEEK 7

Here's some Uneducated Guesses on how Week 7 of the Canadian Interuniversity Sport football season might shake out, or more likely, how it won't shake out.

HIGHLIGHTS

• Laval to defend its No. 1 ranking with a close win (less than a field goal) at home against Concordia
• Guelph to upset Windsor in a nationally televised game
• McMaster to bounce back from a home loss to Laurier by beating Western

FEATURED GAMES

No. 5 CONCORDIA STINGERS vs. No. 1 LAVAL ROUGE ET OR
Sunday, 1 p.m. (RDS; all times EDT)
Has Laval been the top team in Canada to this point? No. Still, whether or not Concordia QB Scott Syvret is cleared to play, the Rouge et Or are set for a breakout game, especially with a national TV audience, a sold-out crowd and a challenger in the Stingers. Memories of last year's Stinger trip up to Quebec City -- a 43-20 Laval win -- are very fresh. Concordia will keep it close, but a lack of consistency on offence, combined with Laval's crowd advantage, tips this one to the Rouge et Or -- barring turnovers or some big plays on special teams by the Stingers. The Call: Laval 17-15

WINDSOR LANCERS (4-2) vs. GUELPH GRYPHONS (2-4)
Saturday, 2 p.m. (The Score)
Sorely tempted to take the Gryphons to pull the upset on national TV -- they can put up points, and we all know about the Lancers' inability to stake their claim as an OUA heavyweight, or put up gaudy rushing stats against quality teams. The caveats with the Gryphons is that QB Justin Dunk, the country's most prolific passer, is still awfully young, and Windsor's ever-shifting coverages and packages might get him a little confused. Still, Guelph can pull this off -- especially if all-purpose back Nick FitzGibbon breaks some big plays and their defence contains Windsor's Daryl Stephenson. The way the OUA is going this season, nothing should surprise anyone anymore, so Guelph it is. The Call: Guelph 29-26

#7 McMASTER MARAUDERS (5-1) vs. WESTERN MUSTANGS (4-2)
Saturday, 2 p.m.
McMaster's coming off a loss and is a little banged-up (QB Adam Archibald, SB Jon Behie, and DB Jesse Card are all injury concerns). Still, the Marauders are deeper and more physical, and Western isn't throwing the ball well enough to threaten them. Defensively, the Mustangs' still arm-tackle too much. Mustangs quarterback Michael Faulds is sixth in the CIS in passing yardage, but then you notice the low yards-per-attempt and the poor TD-to-INT ratio. The Call: McMaster 30-20.

CANADA WEST

SIMON FRASER (0-4-0-1) vs. No. 2 MANITOBA BISONS (5-0)
Saturday, 3 p.m.
Simon Fraser lost 77-7 to the Bisons earlier this year. Let's hope Bisons coach Brian Dobie is a man of mercy. The Call: Manitoba 52-13

No. 3 SASKATCHEWAN HUSKIES (5-1) vs. REGINA RAMS (2-3)
Saturday, 4 p.m.
Imagined headline in this week's Carillon, the U of R student paper: "Mr. T to pity Rams." Frank McCrystal's defensively challenged crew gets their in-province rivals a week after a loss, which is typically when the Huskies are their meanest. While having tailback Graham Mosiondz back helps Regina's cause, the U of S is simply better, plus last week against Manitoba was a call to action that they need to be more physical up front, especially on defence. To add insult to injury, U of S pivot Bret Thompson will probably put up more passing yards than Rams QB Teale Orban. The Call: Saskatchewan 41-24

CALGARY DINOS (0-5) vs. No. 9 ALBERTA GOLDEN BEARS(3-2)
Saturday, 9 p.m.
The Bears are at home, with a bye week, against a team that lost its last two games by a combined 82-13. No way they should lose, right? Well, with underachieving Alberta, anything is possible. So long as the Golden Bears don't make a game of it, they should roll. If Alberta wins, circle Oct. 28 on the calendar -- that's when Calgary hosts Simon Fraser in the season finale, with the distinct possibility both once-proud programs will still be winless. The Call: Alberta 28-14

ONTARIO

QUEEN'S GOLDEN GAELS (2-4) vs. YORK LIONS (1-5)
Saturday, 2 p.m.
Two years ago, these teams combined for a Keystone Kops finish, where Queen's missed a last-second field goal for the win, only to get a second chance at it and subsequently convert after York's return man fumbled the ball back to the Gaels. Queen's is a hurting unit, but their defence will give them plenty of chances for the offence to get untracked. Hopefully Queen's noticed how it got its lone touchdown last week, a window-dressing TD from backup QB Ibrahim Zylstra to slotback Brad Smith: They threw the ball up the field! The Call: Queen's 25-23

U OF T VARSITY BLUES (0-6) vs. No. 7 LAURIER GOLDEN HAWKS (5-1)
Saturday, 2 p.m.
True story: When Laurier went 1-7 in 2002, they actually outscored their opposition on the season. Guess who their one win was over? The Call: Laurier 45-10

WATERLOO WARRIORS (2-4) vs. No. 4 OTTAWA GEE-GEES(5-1)
Saturday, 2 p.m.
Ottawa's been playing a lot of guys in the last couple weeks, but you have to wonder about a No. 4-ranked team that's only scored two first-half touchdowns -- one on a Hail Mary and the other on a jump ball -- in the past two weeks against a pair of teams that are a combined 4-8. They will beat Waterloo no problem, but stil you wonder if those slow starts will hurt them in an OUA semifinal against McMaster. The Call: Ottawa 27-13

QUEBEC

No. 8 MONTREAL CARABINS (3-2) vs. BISHOP'S GAITERS(1-4)
Saturday, 1 p.m.
What is it about Quebec schools having trouble putting the ball in the air? For years, Laval couldn't kick. This year, Montreal can't pass. Joseph Mroue will have a big day against a young Gaiters defence. The Call: Montreal 30-7

SHERBROOKE VERT ET OR (2-3) vs. McGILL REDMEN (1-4)
Saturday, 1 p.m.
The Redmen are dedicating this game to former defensive back Strachan Hartley (brother of Canadian Olympic diver Blythe Hartley and former Queen's tailback Wyatt Hartley), now a young doctor who is in his second round of chemotherapy in his battle against non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. That's enough to give anyone pause before making some snide comment about the Redmen, but they don't have the running game or defence to handle the Vert et Or, who should move closer to sewing up the final Quebec playoff spot. The Call: Sherbrooke 31-20

ATLANTIC

MOUNT ALLISON MOUNTIES (1-4) vs. SAINT MARY'S HUSKIES(2-3)
Friday, 6 p.m.
The Huskies have got a little of the old "Sm-you Sneer" back, and it's back to reality for Mount A now that the giddiness of ending The Streak (and before U of T!) has passed. The Call: SMU 34-19
(UPDATE: Game was postponed due to the flu outbreak on the Mount A. campus. No one's sure how they'll squeeze it in with only two weeks left in the regular season, but the most reasonable suggestion seems to be to just let all four Atlantic teams into the playoffs.)

ST. FRANCIS XAVIER (2-3) vs. ACADIA AXEMEN (3-2)
Saturday, 1 p.m.
Big game for the Axemen, who will move closer to securing first place and bye into the Atlantic final with a win. Acadia should right themselves if starting QB Chris Judd comes back and plays the whole game. With the X-Men, it's not for nothing they share a name with some comic book characters -- they appear to be able to take on other forms from week to week. Acadia's O-line will have to contain X-Men defensive lineman Yahia Dalloul, who grew up in Palestine. The Call: Acadia 20-13

Last week: 9-4 (69.2%)
Season: 59-13 (84.7%)
Closest call last week: Concordia 37-14 over McGill (actual score 41-13)

Previous:
Weeks 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 & 6

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

R.I.P., CORY LIDLE, CROUCHING TIGERS AND OTHER VAGUELY THURSDAY ITEMS

If the Leafs fans in your life look at all jittery or distracted, well, Wade Belak is back on the blue line tonight. That should explain everything.

• Neil Acharya's call of Craig Monroe for ALCS MVP looked rather prescient last night. The Detroit left-fielder had two RBI to help the Tigers beat Oakland 8-5 and go up two games to none in the American League Championship Series. No team has ever lost the ALCS after winning the first two games on the road.
• Not too shabby for my Swedes in Euro 2008 qualifying: They spotted Iceland first goal yesterday, got it back right away courtesy of a Kim Källström strike and went ahead for good on Christian Wilhelmsson's goal around the 60th minute, prevailing 2-1 and remaining unbeaten in qualifying. Hmmmmm. Can you get teased for cheering for a national side that has a guy named Kim?
• Something of note for university sports fans in the nation's capital: the Ottawa Gee-Gees and Carleton Ravens have called a joint press conference for this morning at Scotiabank Place.
  
  You'd assume it has something to do with the CIS Final 10 men's basketball championship, which is to be held here from 2008 through '10. However, remember, Carleton will be a full-fledged CIS hockey team against in 2007-08. Most likely it has something to do with hoops.
  
  (UPDATE: Indeed it does... Carleton and the Ottawa Gee-Gees men's b-ball teams will play at Scotiabank Place on Jan. 23. Top ticket: $25. Get the lame joke out of the way: "Twenty-five dollars to watch Canadian college basketball? Does that count as a charitable donation?" Regular readers know this space gives pub to CIS sports, so save the hate mail.
  
  Should Dave Smart's Ravens win a fifth straight national title this winter, then it will be all but assured return trips for the next three seasons. That might spark some controversy... did the Victoria Vikes earn their trip to nationals each season when they won seven titles in a row during the 1980s?
• It's a damn shame that Cory Lidle, the Yankees pitcher and former Blue Jay, is leaving behind family and friends after dying in a plane crash in New York City yesterday. Richard Griffin has a particularly good column in today's Toronto Star that probably captures what Lidle went through as a former scab player who worked his butt off to have a major-league career, despite never being accepted by many players because of the choice he was forced to make back in the spring of 1995. There should be no glory for scab labourers, but at the same time, understand that many of the minor leaguers who did so were making peanuts and had the screws turned on them by some of the more hawkish major-league organizations at the time.
  
  That's not to say people can't make jokes. One of the first comments on Deadspin was (and Lidle's death wasn't even confirmed), "The plane should have been carrying A-Rod... That way it wouldn't have hit anything."

Back with more later, including the CIS Week 7 football picks. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

HOSER PATHOS: A SOMEWHAT EGGHEADED LOOK AT THE TRAILER PARK BOYS MOVE

(Originally posted Tues., Oct. 10.)

Some hard-core fans of the Trailer Park Boys probably hated the the movie. That was inevitable.

Yours truly doesn't qualify as a hardcore fan of the show... it was no skin off my nose not to have Showcase on the cable package this winter and thus miss Season 6 of the show. Besides, the series peaked with the Season 4 finale, the Rita MacNeil episode, which climaxed with Ricky and a dress-wearing Jim Lahey (don't ask) in an armed standoff in downtown Dartmouth. Still, I have been a fan since 2002, long before most people, and have found playing with a Conky finger puppet to be an effective stress-buster.

Trailer Park Boys: The Movie is uneven at times, but it delivers. Some of the DIY trappings of the TV show have been Hollywooded out. The dialogue is more tightly scripted -- for instance, Lahey gets off only one good "shit analogy" rant.

The plot meanders a bit. The same was true, though, of other quote-unquote Canadian cult classics turned out by Hollywood -- Strange Brew, Wayne's World, and of course, Slap Shot.

That's tolerable, however. What pokes through is TPB's true spirit, which doesn't merely lie in the characters, the screwy situations and their sustaining belief that everything's gonna work out, but in how the show sells hoserdom to Canucks.

This country's becoming more and more urban, more Americanized, more diverse. Ricky, Bubbles and Julian and their various associates are beloved first and foremost since their antics are funny, but we also need them since, well, we miss them and the walk of life they represent. It's no wonder that people always see elements of the neighbourhood losers they knew grewing up in these guys. So what if your neighbourhood probably didn't have a guy living in a car?

The show has always been hoser bathos, never more so than in the Trailer Park Boys Christmas Special, where Bubbles learned the reason his parents left him was that his dad got in trouble by "drinkin' and shootin' his mouth off down at the Legion."

A Mordecai Richler character once mused that if Canada had a soul, it was in dingy little small-town bars, and so it is with TPB. The movie has more than enough of non-government-sponsored Canadiana, the kind that has road salt all over it.

When Ricky comes on to his girfriend Lucy in the movie, saying, "I'll get some chicken, some liquor, some hash, we'll bang, and listen to April Wine," what's funny isn't his idea of romance, but how he drops in the reference to the '70s/'80s-vintage mid-level hoser rockers, as if mentioning April Wine in and of itself will gain Lucy's love. (Which it almost does.)

Another Nova Scotia trapping is Ricky's pronouncing tournament "turn-a-ment." It's a little subtlety, but being by being very particular, it takes on a universality. There's plenty of little slices that Canadians will get -- including Ricky's goalie gear for prison ball hockey, which includes a lunch tray blocker and a milk bottle mask.

A related reading is that Trailer Park Boys can be seen as a parody to all those well-meaning low-budget Canadian movies and TV shows of the '70s and '80s that were striving so hard to be anti-Hollywood and define what was Canadian. Whether consciously or not, the Boys subvert that idea of depicting everyday Canucks by turning its salt-of-the-earth hosers into out-and-out cartoons.

So when you're seeing Trailer Park Boys: The Movie, you're sort of seeing remnants of every painfully earnest Canadian movie or TV show that you ever gave a chance before quickly getting bored and flipping to a U.S. station. That's part of the reason the show and now the movie are so big.

We do like seeing ourselves on the movie screen, after all.

It used to be you couldn't find a Canadian movie in a first-run theatre and if you did see one, you only saw it out of ostentation or patriotic duty. Now you can spend two hours with the boys from Sunnyvale and it doesn't feel like slumming. So don't say that the Boys have gone Hollywood on us. That's not seeing the big picture. It was probably inevitable Hollywood would colonize Sunnyvale Trailer Park, but as Ricky's dad, Ray, once said, "That's the f---in' way she goes, boys."

Besides, the movie is laugh-out-loud funny, in parts, so by the time the end credits roll, set to a Tragically Hip song (what else?), you'll likely leave feeling satisfied, fan of the show or not.

Related:
All The Drama & Dialogue We'd Expect (Toronto Star)
Trailer Park Boys down & dirty (Toronto Sun)

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

SENS HAVE DATE WITH RAYZER

Some midday items of note:

• This just in: Martin Gerber is Swiss-German for "Patrick Lalime."
  
  The pride of Cayuga, Ray Emery, gets the start in goal tomorrow for the Senators against the Calgary Flames. Hey, no one thought Senators coach Bryan Murray was going to start Gerber for all 82 games... the guess here was 75, figuring that Murray would let Emery start all four games against the Islanders, and maybe a couple against the Leafs.
• Didn't type "last-place Senators" up there since while technically it's true, we're trying to build some bridges here.
• The early response to an Ottawa Sun poll is running about 90% in favour of Jeff Hunt being recruited by one of the other CFL bidders now the Golden Gate Capital Corp. bid is no more due to its leader, Ernest Anderson, having contracted intestinal cancer. One wishes Anderson the best, of course, and no one could have foreseen this, but it does point out the problem: A lot of people, with some encourgament from the media no doubt, believed Jeff Hunt was the one-and-only person who could save the CFL in Ottawa-Gatineau.
  
  Hunt is saying today that he wouldn't rule out joining one of the other bids, but it's hard to see him getting involved if he's not in the frontman role. Not many business guys are big on being a fifth wheel.
• Finally, a reason to watch boring U.S. college football (well, there's that, and there's Rutgers being 5-0): Tomorrow night, a walk-on named Steve Aponavicius will handle some of the kicking duties for Boston College in a nationally televised game against Virginia Tech. Aponavicius, out of Easton, Pa., has never played in a football game, on any level.

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

TIGERS TENACIOUS AT THE PLATE, AND OTHER HUMPDAY ITEMS

This is our song of exultant joy, because we only came to kick some ass...

• Apologies for the really highbrow take on Trailer Park Boys: The Movie last night.
• Pretty straightforward, really, for the Detroit Tigers in their 5-1 win over the Oakland A's last night in Game 1 of the American League Championship Series. Brandon Inge broke out of a slump with a big early homer, and the normally free-swinging Tigers exercised some plate discipline against A's lefty Barry Zito. Oh, me of little faith.
• Wife-swapping, Keith Hernandez reminding us of all men's struggle that we "labour under the deep-down delusion that Christina Hall or Alison Migneault or whatever her name may be is waiting by the phone," plus a press box crasher who looks kind of like that Seinfeld guy. Yes, lots of fun has been had here at the expense of the New York Mets.
• Reading Scott Carefoot's RaptorBlog reminds you that there are probably two good basketball writers in Toronto, and only one of whom writes for a daily newspaper.
  
  Yours truly is trying not to crack on TV guys and newspaper scribes, but I'll direct you to where Scott calls out one newspaper guy for apparently writing that a 6-foot-2 guy can play small forward in the NBA. Six-foot-two is barely big enough for small forward in Canadian high school.
• Queen's Golden Gaels coach Pat Sheahan hasn't lost his sense of humour, if the lede to the game story in Tuesday's Kingston Whig-Standard is any indicator:
  
  Pat Sheahan spotted the yellow gift bag on the desk as he went into his office Saturday afternoon. Minutes after his football team was beaten 34-13 by the Ottawa Gee-Gees, he gingerly peeked around the tissue paper inside.
  
  "I have to check these packages to make sure there isn't anything ticking," the Queen's Golden Gaels coach said.
  
  Yes, it's good to have a sense of humour when you bleed Tricolour these days. Hey, maybe the focus should switch to those other Golden Gaels footballers: The women's soccer Gaels, led by Eilish McConville (nation-best 15 goals), are ranked No. 3 in the CIS Canada, with just one loss in 12 matches. Oh, and the women's hockey team is ranked No. 6 heading into Saturday's opener against Western. Live in fear, Mustangs.

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

SAVING OTTAWA SPORTS: GOLDEN GATE CLOSES DOOR ON CFL BID

This very well could derail the hopes of reviving the CFL in Ottawa-Gatineau, though let's not be too hasty.

Golden Gate Capital Corp. has withdrawn from the bid process to become the owner of the revived team, since one of the bid leaders, Ernest Anderson, has sudden health problems.

That is the group that involves Ottawa 67's owner Jeff Hunt, whom the local media has depicted as the one and only guy who could win over an understandably skeptical general public that's still rubbing salve on the burn marks left by Bernie and Lonnie Glieberman, among others.

The Ottawa Sun's Chris Stevenson has a blog post up... apparently Hunt is willing to be part of another ownership group, which would have to be the one fronted by Bill (Dad of Jesse) Palmer that involves some Florida investors. Never met Jeff Hunt, but he sure looks smart enough to know better than to get involved with beer baron Frank D'Angelo, who seems determined to be a pest throughout this whole process.

Previous:
Let's Be Frank: This Isn't The Wright Man To Save The CFL in Ottawa (Aug. 18)
Vote of Confidence for City's Football Future (Aug. 10)

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

MLB PLAYOFFS: WHO'S WORLD SERIOUS?

Let's see: Mets, Tigers, Cardinals and A's contending for the World Series, the Yankees are in disarray... hey, it sounds like the 1980s!

Does that mean the Toronto Blue Jays will go back to the old powder blue pajama top jerseys and start winning like they did in the '80s and '90s? Granted, the way the last few years have gone for the Jays, most fans would settle just for seeing the powder blues again.

CARDS-METS

Save for the blog The Cub Reporter, you can't find anyone who's taking the St. Louis Cardinals over the New York Mets in the National League.

So put yours truly down for a What the Hell pick: Cardinals in 6. No one will remember either way in two weeks' time, so might as well go on a limb and throw the old reputation after that 15-20% chance that St. Louis can knock off the Mets.

Yes, the Cardinals won only 83 games, and yes, they almost blew an 8 1/2-game lead in the final three weeks. Yes, they're starting Jeff Weaver in Game 1 tomorrow night. It would pain me to see ex-Jay Carlos Delgado, whose borderline Hall of Fame credentials would get a big boost from a World Series ring, miss out.

The Mets have a better lineup and a deeper bench, although the back end of their rotation is kind of dodgy. By all logic, they should win, and teams that win only 83 games shouldn't be going to the World Series. Still, if Albert Pujols and one other Cardinals hitter, say Juan Encarnacion, get hot, and if Cards catcher Yadier Molina nullifies base-stealer supreme Jose Reyes, and the Cardinals steal one of the first two games in New York, then by all means this will be a series. Both teams will be into their third and fourth starters when they go to St. Louis.

If it sounds a little flimsy to you, that's because it is. Regardless, put the mid-market Cards in the Series (Pujols will be series MVP) against the A's, a team that averages less than 25,000 fans, and watch Fox executives try to spin-doctor when they get record-low ratings. Hey, serves 'em right for overhyping the New York teams.

TIGERS-A'S

You could argue that the Tigers might be more emotionally spent after vanquishing the Yankees, and that it might be hard to get up for Oakland, now that everyone's on the Detroit bandwagon and expecting them to win.

Associate Blogger Neil Acharya figures the Tigers-A's ALCS will be the best so far this decade, save for the Evil Empires' mini-series back in '03 and '04.

Without going into reams of eye-glazing statistical analysis, yours truly likes the Oakland A's to win in seven games. "Head" picks, in the long run, usually win out over "heart" picks, and while the Tigers are the feel-good story of this baseball year, there's serious questions about the consistency of their starting pitching and their defence. Their lineup, aside from shortstop Carlos Guillen, seems filled with a bunch of guys who can hit a mistake 420 feet, then look awful chasing curveballs the next time through the order. Their walk-to-strikeout ratio was by far the worst in the AL, as they were 13th in both categories.

The A's probably fly under a lot of people's radar screens. They don't have any superstar position players, plus the Moneyball aura has died down. However, they are a fairly patient bunch (.340 team on-base average, 11 points higher than Detroit's) and their pitching staff is at least equal to that of the Tigers.

Granted, the A's have a middle infield of Marco Scutaro and D'Angelo Jimenez, and only Jays general manager J.P. Ricciardi would try to pass that off as a championship-calibre double-play combination. Also, if they make the Series, their regular outfield of Jay Payton, Mark Kotsay and Milton Bradley will arguably the weakest for a Series team since the 2000 Mets, who coincidentally, also had Payton starting.

Still, the A's pitching and plate discipline make them too tempting to pass up. Neil is taking the Tigers, with Craig Monroe as MVP; I'll take the A's and Eric Chavez, who's seeking redemption after an injury-riddled regular season, to cop MVP honours.

Admittedly, Barry Zito or Nick Swisher would be safer MVP picks for an A's backer.

Best Deadspin comment on the baseball's final four:

"Yankees in four. What? They're not in the ALCS? ... umm ... Red Sox in five. Huh? The Blue Jays finished ahead of them?

"Jesus, what kind of ALCS is this?"

Anyway... here's some predictions from various experts:

American League
Neil Acharya, Associate Blogger: Tigers in 7 (MVP: Craig Monroe)
Baseball Musings: Gives the Tigers a 60% chance
Batter's Box: A's in 6 (chosen by 33% of poll respondents)
Jeff Blair, Globe and Mail: A's in 7
The Cub Reporter: A's in 7
Cool Standings: Tigers in 6
Scott Carson, Sportsnet.ca: Tigers in 7
Deadspin: Tigers in 7
John Donovan, SI.com: A's in 6
Eric Mack, CBS Sportsline: A's in 6
Charlie McCarthy, CBS Sportsline: A's in 6
Scott Miller, CBS Sportsline: Tigers in 6
Larry Millson, Globe and Mail: Tigers in 7
Adriane Rosen, CBS Sportsline: A's in 6
Toronto Star: Tigers in 6

National League
Neil Acharya, Associate Blogger: Mets in 7 (MVP: Carlos Delgado)
Baseball Musings: Gives the Mets a 70% chance
Batter's Box: Mets in 5 (chosen by 41% of poll respondents)
Jeff Blair, Globe and Mail: Mets in 5
The Cub Reporter: Cards in 7
Cool Standings: Mets in 6
Scott Carson, Sportsnet.ca: Mets in 5
Eric Mack, CBS Sportsline: Mets in 7
Charlie McCarthy, CBS Sportsline: Mets in 6
Scott Miller, CBS Sportsline: Mets in 5
Larry Millson, Globe and Mail: Mets in 6
Adriane Rosen, CBS Sportsline: Mets in 6
Toronto Star: Mets in 5

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

BLOG BLAST PAST, NO. 9: METSMERIZED

The New York Mets, who open the National League Championship Series tomorrow night against the St. Louis Cardinals, fairly deserve a Blog Blast Past due to all the fun this space has had at their expense.

Here's three Mets-related posts, all of which were linked by Deadspin:

SOME FAKE BASEBALL NEWS DELIVERED BY JERRY SEINFELD'S APPARENT LONG-LOST SON (Aug. 20)
It's the story of a Ryan Leli, the Long Island teen who was arrested for impersonating a journalist at Shea Stadium. What was funny that the kid's MySpace Page left reason to believe he had been pulling these stunts for a while, since he had pictures of him with every male celebrity except for Jerry Seinfeld. Oh, and as Denver blogger Gabe Stein noted, those guys behind Tom Cruise are "clearly his Scientology goons. Quite clearly."

IN A WAY, WE ALL PLAYED FIRST BASE (June 21)
Some other bloggers called out ex-Metropolitans first baseman Keith Hernandez, now a TV analyst, for false-hipsterness during a broadcast: "I like Eddie Vedder ... I like him when he’s solo more than…with the band."

I hypothesized that Keith still had a complex over failing to seal the deal with Elaine Benes during his 1992 guest shot on Seinfeld.

"His dilemma, his struggle, his pathos, is that of all guys:

"A) trying to act cool to impress women;
B) thinking someone you dated or had an unrequited crush on a virtual lifetime ago is still interested.

"We all do it. We all labour under the deep-down delusion that Christina Hall or Alison Migneault or whatever her name may be is waiting by the phone, when in all probability she's forgotten you, assuming she even knew your name in the first place.

"... You have to move on, Keith. Yes, you were a baseball player, you won the MVP in '79, and you can do whatever you want -- and I say this with an unblemished record of staunch heterosexuality, Just For Men has helped you look not half-bad for 52 years old.

"... it was only a TV show, and it was 14 years ago. Move on."

(That said, you can't blame Keith if he was still smitten by Julia Louis-Dreyfus, even if her new show ain't that all fired great. Oh, and those names that appeared there? Totally plucked out of the ether at random. Not a real person who might have crossed my path. No sirree.)

TOP 5: NEW YORK BASEBALL SEX SCANDALS (Aug. 14)
Babe Ruth's "bellyache," left-handed pitchers trading wives (and kids, and dogs), some strange "action" in the Mets bullpen and Cleon Jones' strange sleeping habits ... members of the Gotham hardball concerns have had some odd affairs of the heart down through the years.

Still, no one can top Luis Polonia's embarrassing moment. Fortunately for Luis, his little peccadillo happened when the Yankees were No. 2 behind the Mets in the New York tabloid pecking order.

Previous Blog Blasts Past: Remembering Tom Cheek, Movie Love Interests, Girlfriend-Friendly Sports Movies, Garth Snow This To Your Friends, The One and Only Warren Zevon, Damn Vikings, Me 'N' Adnan V.

Anyway, enough grab-assing around here. Time to deliver some half-witted LCS previews. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

JAYS FANS WILL SOON HAVE A HATE-ON FOR THIS GUY

Some stuff to chew on as you try to avoid hitting the 3 p.m. wall:

• Daisuke Matsuzaka, the right-hander for the Seibu Lions who was MVP of the World Baseball Classic (don't worry, no one expects you to remember any of that, except for the U.S. getting beat by Canada), is on his way to the majors.
  
  There's not a hope in hell that the Blue Jays can even get in the game in the Daisuke derby... coming off a season in Japan where he went 17-5 with a 2.13 ERA and 200 strikeouts, he'll go to the highest bidder, probably the Yankees, who need someone to replace Mike Mussina. It's one thing that Japanese stars can come to the majors, but about three-quarters of the teams are cut off from the elite players. So be it.
• The Yankees are saying Joe Torre will stay as manager, but you have to admit there was some plausibility to the scenario where he would have been canned the day before the World Series starts. Their great leader Derek Jeter hasn't said anything publicly to defend his manager, and Newsday's Shaun Powell says the captain's silence speaks volumes.
• He's saying what we're all thinking... Steve Young told Michael Irvin on Monday Night Football last night, "You could talk for another five, 10 minutes and you still wouldn't make any sense." (Deadspin.)

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

LEAFS ACTUALLY WIN A SHOOTOUT

Things you may have noticed while preoccupied with the mystery of who put that mud in the freezer... who wants chocolate ice cream?

• NHL: Leafs 2, Florida Panthers 1 (shootout). Leafs play hit-the-logo for most of the night against Florida's Alex Auld (47 saves), the one-time member of the Manitoba Moose. (Gee, winters in Miami or Winnipeg? That's a tough call, seriously. Festival du Voyageur is a killer time, man.) Since the Leafs were getting stoned by Auld left and right, went to a shootout, where the Leafs actually won, with Mats Sundin and Darcy Tucker solving the Auld riddle.
  
  There's reason for cautious enthusiasm surrounding this Leafs club, even though Pavel Kubina's likely gone for a while, meaning five defencemen are now hurt.
• CFL: Argos 28, Eskimos 23. Hey, there's that Toronto running game that's been in absentia all year, with Ricky Williams as Mr. Inside and John Avery as Mr. Outside. And still the Argos barely beat a last-place Edmonton team, and needed a defensive touchdown to pull off that very mean feat. Oh, by the way, Edmonton is 0-6 this year against the East. Eat it, northern Alberta.
  
  The Argos are now 9-6. Where are all the columnists saying how the season was a "disaster"? Well, they were probably at the Leafs game, or on the road covering the baseball playoffs or the Buffalo Bills. Those are my best guesses.
• NFL: Denver Broncos 13, Baltimore Ravens 3. The Broncos earned themselves a spot on the Out of Left Field notice board -- they were four-point favourites against Baltimore and with a late 6-3 lead, could have run out the clock. But no, they had to punch in a touchdown, thus missing a chance to tie the three-week-old record for the lowest-scoring Monday Night Football game ever -- and blowing someone's pick for Baltimore to cover. Just like the Vikings on Sunday. What is it with these NFL teams and their fascination with the unnecessary late score?

Back later with a look at the baseball playoffs, plus a possible take on the Trailer Park Boys movie. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

CIS CORNER: NATIONAL RANKINGS RANKLE

In the wake of Shakeup Saturday, the latest CIS Football Top 10 comes out today, but first there's a few questions:

1. Sure, they won again and are 5-0 this fall, but are the Laval Rouge et Or really deserving of the No. 1 ranking?
No. Laval hasn't been as out-and-out dominant as in the past. Conference rival Concordia, which came into last weekend No. 6 and is due to rise, actually has a higher winning margin (22.4 points to Laval's 18.6). The difference is that coach Gerry McGrath's Stingers began the season unranked.

However, dropping Laval from No. 1 is a non-starter until they lose. You know the logic: They'll be No. 1 until someone proves otherwise. Concordia gets a chance to in their only regular-season meeting against Laval on Sunday (1 p.m. ET, RDS).

2. How far will No. 2 Saskatchewan and No. 3 McMaster fall after losing at home last weekend?
The Manitoba Bisons, who went into Griffiths Stadium and upset the U of S 35-23, may leapfrog over both teams into the No. 2 rung, with the U of S holding at No. 3 due to reputation. Whether that's an accurate reading is another story. As for Mac, see the following question.

3. Where should the three 5-1 teams in a logjam at the top of the Ontario University Athletics conference be ranked?
Tough one. The No. 7 Laurier Golden Hawks have won four in a row, although that 31-12 score against the No. 3 McMaster Marauders on Saturday probably flattered them a bit -- Mac was missing its best defensive back, Jesse Card, and lost QB Adam Archibald and slotback Jon Behie to injuries during the game.

The guess here is that the Ottawa Gee-Gees hold at No. 5, Mac falls to No. 6 and Laurier stays at No. 7. That's what might happen, but don't confuse that with what should happen. It could have been an off-day, with players distracted by the Thanksgiving holiday, and coach Denis Piché did play a fair number of backups (D-lineman Dan Kennedy, linebacker Cheelor Linder and tailback Davie Masson were among the sitting starters), but Ottawa wasn't sharp in their 34-13 win over Queen's last Saturday.

They had four turnovers, and Josh Sacobie, their quarterback, missed several open receivers, keeping the game closer than it should have been. Despite mental mistakes and inept offence on the part of Queen's, Ottawa didn't put the game away until well into the third quarter.

At one point, with Queen's driving early in the second half, an Ottawa fan remarked, "The fireside chat doesn't seem to be working this week," alluding to a quote Piché gave to the Ottawa Sun after the Gee-Gees outscored Guelph 31-0 in the second half the week before.

Ottawa isn't the No. 5 team in Canada, but like Laval, they opened the season ranked high. They close with Waterloo and the U of T, so they have little to worry about so far as rankings are concerned. Besides, you shouldn't be worrying about rankings, although apparently the Windsor Lancers missed that memo.

4. Does the Atlantic conference, where the top regular-season team could conceivably have a 4-4 record, deserve to have a ranked team?
Possibly, but it might not be the Acadia Axemen (3-2), who lead the conference. The two-time conference champions aren't going to move back into the Top 10 since they lost at home last week to Saint Mary's (2-3). First-year head coach Steve Sumurah's Huskies looks like it might be on its way to fulfilling Out of Left Field's pre-season prophesy that they may "be this year's version of the team that has a so-so 4-4 or 5-3 regular season and then finds something that works in the playoffs."

The Huskies won in Acadia's backyard on Saturday, 24-21, and while some would point out that was their first win over a quality opponent (the other was over perpetually rebuilding Mount Allison), the three consecutive losses they opened the season with were by 2, 2, and 4 points, the first and last of those against teams that were ranked going into the game.

Saint Mary's may have supplanted Acadia as the Atlantic favourite, but putting a sub-.500 team in the top 10 at this point of the season is too radical. Plus, the rankings are political. What will Acadia, the Alberta Golden Bears (each 3-2) or the Western Mustangs and Windsor Lancers (both 4-2) say if they're not ranked and a 2-3 team is?

5. Why is that by Week 6 or 7, it seems to be pretty tough to determine the last couple spots in the Top 10?
Simply put, 27 teams doesn't offer enough depth for a legitimate top 10, but our society likes our lists to be in denominations of 5 and 10, so the CIS invites controversy at this time of year by making the pollsters sift through teams with records such as 3-2, 3-3 and 4-2. Hey, there's nothing wrong with inviting controversy.

There are nine teams you can comfortably rank: Manitoba, Saskatchewan and the UBC Thunderbirds in Can West, the Mac-Laurier-Ottawa troika in Ontario, and Laval, Concordia and Montreal from the Quebec conference.

The odd team out might appear to be UBC (3-2). Due to a defence that sometimes has more leaks than a substandard Vancouver condo, the T-Birds are only a couple plays from being 5-0, having lost to Alberta and Saskatchewan in the final seconds. By the way, UBC's tailback, Chris Ciezki, who's averaging 9.1 yards per carry and has scored nine touchdowns on just 79 touches, should be generating some serious Hec Crighton Trophy buzz.

What's wrong with all the other teams who have winning records?

Alberta (3-2): Can't score to save their lives and almost lost to last-place Simon Fraser; they've perhaps been the most disappointing team in the country (well, outside of Kingston, but you know my bias there).

Windsor (4-2): The teams they beat are a combined 5-19, plus they'll likely be an underdog against a 2-4 Guelph team this week. Tailback Daryl Stephenson has averaged 178.3 yards in the Lancers' wins and 76.5 yards in their losses.

Western (4-2): Only semi-impressive win was over Windsor, and beating the U of T by 23 points isn't far less impressive than what No. 10 Alberta did last weekend.

(Alberta had a bye. Sorry for having to explain the joke.)

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

JOE'S ABOUT TO GO, BUT WHEN?

Joe Torre being fired by the New York Yankees seems to be a matter of when, not if, so the question to ask yourselves is how long George M. Steinbrenner III will let a decent and honourable man twist in the wind.

The new Yankees manager will likely be Lou Piniella. He's a winner, and having been in Seattle, has a proven track record for rubbing Vaseline all over Alex Rodriguez's heinie and telling him that it's special and different from everyone else's (uh, figuratively speaking).

Big Stein and the Yankees will probably want to drag this out a bit, since the Mets are in the National League Championship Series and destined for the World Series. Big Stein absolutely hates it when the Mets are on the back page of New York tabloids.

(As for the NLCS, no one should take the St. Louis Cardinals lightly. After all, Tony La Russa's team did win almost 84 games in a division that includes Pittsburgh, Milwaukee and the Chicago Cubs. Seriously, though, don't take the Cardinals lightly.)

The guess here is that the speculation will last through the Mets-Cardinals series, and if the Mets advance, then the ax falls on Torre on Friday, Oct. 20, the eve of Game 1 of the World Series. By the way, if I wake up at noon to the news Torre is done, this post never appeared.

To continue on the tangent, the new manager, likely Piniella, probably gets introduced early the following week, perhaps on Tuesday, Oct. 24, the day the Mets would play their first home game of the Series. This isn't inside information; it's just an educated guess.

(Actually, ex-Marlins manager Joe Girardi is equally likely to get the job, but there was no Anchorman reference that applied to him. By the way, if it is Girardi, someone will start screaming conspiracy between Jeffrey Loria, Bud Selig and Big Stein.)

As for Torre, he is a decent and honourable man, but his managerial savvy has become a little dodgy. If you have a copy of Rob Neyer's Big Book of Baseball Blunders, read up on how he probably cost the Yankees the 2003 World Series against the Florida freakin' Marlins. Oh, and batting A-Rod eighth against the Tigers? Predictably, all it did was turn A-Rod into even more of a mope. Twenty-four hours later, it seems like a give-up move.

Related:
Torre's Time To Be Moving On (Shaun Powell, Newsday)
After Yankees' Early Exit, Joe Must Go (Jon Heyman, SI.com)
Say It Ain't So: A-Rod Can't Beat The Tigers, So He Might Join Them? (Oct. 8)

Back with more later. Happy Thanksgiving for those of you who still have another bird to feast on. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

BLOG BLAST PAST, NO. 8: REMEMBERING THE GREAT TOM CHEEK, VOICE OF THE JAYS

Today is the first anniversary of the death of Blue Jays radio announcer Tom Cheek, so a Blog Blast Past in order.

Tom was like family for a lot of people. I remember that in the days after he died, having acquaintances whom I seldom ever heard talk about baseball mentioning how it hit them hard, how they were taken back to listening to Jays games on their car radio back in the glory days, when baseball had as much of a hold on the hearts and minds of Ontario sports fans as hockey.

I teared up listening in the car when the Jays honoured Tom in August 2004. I recall being on the highway near Hagersville, Ont., on a sunny spring day in 2005, on the way to T.O. to watch the Jays home opener with good friend Neil Acharya, and hearing a catch in Cheek's longtime broadcast partner Jerry Howarth's voice as he told a Fan 590 interviewer that Tom "wasn't doing well." There came the waterworks again. When the Yankees lost this weekend, it meant that all-time crybaby suck Mike Mussina still doesn't have a World Series ring, which serves him right for complaining about the Cheek ceremony back in '04. (Why that story hasn't dogged Mussina more is baffling.)

Hopefully, that introduces it well enough. Here's the post that appeared one week after Tom's death:

IT'S TAKEN ME A WEEK to sort out my thoughts on The Voice of the Blue Jays, Tom Cheek, who died last Sunday after a 16-month battle with brain cancer.

Greater minds such as the Globe and Mail's Stephen Brunt, the Toronto Sun's Bob Elliott as well as the Star's Dave Perkins and Geoff Baker knew the man and rose to the occasion. They all wrote fitting tributes that told the story of how the man lived and how he died without over-squeezing the Kleenex.

As someone who grew up in small-town Ontario loving sports but not being very good at playing them, Tom was one of my heroes.

Today, as someone who's on a low rung of the sports media, he's still a hero to me: I keep reminding myself that he worked in smaller markets until the age of 37, when the Jays hired him to be their first announcer.

If you didn't know who Tom Cheek was, think of your favourite baseball team and its announcers. Imagine if they had been at the mike since Day 1 of the franchise, never missing a broadcast for 27-plus seasons, 4,306 games in a row plus another 41 in the playoffs.

The Jays have had their share of good players through the years. Unlike other expansion franchises -- think of George Brett in Kansas City or Jeff Bagwell and Craig Biggio in Houston -- they have never had a player who was the face of the franchise. Tom slipped into that role before the team ever took the field. Some of the more vivid images from the book he released after the Jays' first World Series title in 1992 date back to the winter of '77, before the first season, when the rookie announcer and manager Roy Hartsfield were travelling to small Canadian towns as part of the Blue Jays' offseason caravan, flying in old planes and in equally dodgy weather conditions. As Cheek wrote, "There were times I wondered if the first announcer and the first manager of the Blue Jays were going to make it to Opening Day."

Enduring experiences such as that was just one example of Cheek's dedication. You don't last 27 years with one team if you're not talented and well-liked, and Cheek was both. As the Star's Chris Zelkovich wrote, it's a terrible oversight that he hasn't been put into the broadcasters' wing of the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, New York.

I've always thought the radio announcer's role was to be a knowledgeable fan, someone who knows the team inside and out, knows when it should be praised and knows when it should be criticized. The criteria for a play-by-play or colour man is straightforward: "Would I want to sit next to him or her at a game?" Some announcers grate on the nerves by sounding disinterested, talking too much, being over-the-top or coming off as smug or a know-it-all. Cheek was always engaged, calling the game, as Zelkovich put it, "simply and honestly."

As the Woodstock Sentinel-Review editorialized, journalism schools should use Cheek as an example to follow. He had the right make-up to get through the long season year after year, making baseball interesting and putting listeners on a first-name basis with the Blue Jays. Jesse, George and Rance in one generation; Devo and Robbie later on; Carlos, Orlando and Doc more recently.

That's why a lot of Canadians, some of whom maybe hadn't tuned into a Blue Jays broadcast since the glory years of 1992-93, had to admit Cheek's death hit them harder than they might have expected. He was so consistently good we took him for granted, assuming he would always be at the mike.

For the Canadians who have the odd affliction of preferring baseball over hockey, Tom Cheek is the Toronto Blue Jays.

What I wouldn't have given to watch one game with him.

Related: Tom Cheek Wikipedia page
Previous Blog Blasts Past: Movie Love Interests, Girlfriend-Friendly Sports Movies, Garth Snow This To Your Friends, The One and Only Warren Zevon, Damn Vikings, Me 'N' Adnan V.

Back with more later. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

DAMN VIKINGS: ROLLICKING RALLY, BUT...

Hard to make head or tail out of the news out of Minnesota that my Vikings rallied for 23 points in the final quarter to beat the Detroit Lions 26-17 yesterday.

Why the muted enthusiasm? First off, it's the Lions, who are only loosely affiliated with the NFL these days, and are so banged-up that they're scouring Monster.com to find offensive linemen, assuming that Matt Millen actually knows how to use the Internet. Secondly, the Vikes overdid it: Linebacker E.J. Henderson's 45-yard interception-return touchdown in the final two minutes enabled them to beat the 7.5-point spread, and I only had them winning outright, not covering.

It was fourth down, E.J.; knock the damn ball down next time. Please try to put all the sensible Minnesota-nice types who bet on the Lions since they could never conceive of this Vikes team ever winning a game by more than a touchdown ahead of your own face time on Sportscenter (or Sportscentre in Canada).

The Vikes are 3-2 headed into their bye week, and are a handful of plays from being 5-0 or 0-5, take your pick. Rookie head coach Brad Childress, though, seems to be get the whole philosopher-king deal. At least with Childress you get the idea that he has idea of what the job's about. Ex-coach Mike Tice left the impression that he spent at least 10 hours a week either trying to remember where he'd parked his car, or banging on the door of the closet he'd accidentally locked himself in.

(DIGRESSION: Somehow Tice is in Jacksonville as an assistant head coach with a playoff-bound team. Perhaps Jags head coach Jack Del Rio has him around so he'll look smart in comparision.)

The Vikes' new broom is converting some members of the Vikings Nation to the Church of Childress, since we believe his balding, unassuming persona masks some great genius for figuring out ways to win football games with only minimal offence. The nice thing about the Church of Childress is that you can wear a hat during the service, since our founder presumably knows the sting of male pattern baldness.

(Not to be a total killjoy, but Dennis Green's first season, 1992, was a lot like that. If memory serves, the Vikes had eight defensive or special-teams touchdowns that season; this crew already has four if you count the TD pass Ryan Longwell completed off a fake field goal game three weeks ago against Carolina.)

Cool Standings still projects the Vikes as only a 9-7 team, with a slightly lesst than a 50/50 chance of making the playoffs. The offence is in the bottom third of the NFL. Longwell's on pace to have 38 field goals and 16 converts. (Any time the kicker has more FGs than converts, there's a problem.)

Eight of the last 11 games are clearly winnable -- Seattle and New England back-to-back later this month and the return game with the Bears on Dec. 3 are the exceptions -- but with the Vikes offence, they're bound to get outscored some week since they have such a slim margin for error. They could end up 11-5, they could be 5-11. That's par for the course in today's NFL.

Related:
Vikings defense launches a major offensive (Minneapolis Star-Tribune)

BLEEDING TRICOLOUR: THE GOLDEN GAELS RESEMBLE AN ED WOOD MOVIE

"I can't go to a bad movie by myself. What am I supposed to do, make sarcastic remarks to strangers?"
-- Jerry, in the Seinfeld episode "The Chinese Restaurant"

Actually, it was a perfect day in Kingston yesterday to go to a bad football game by yourself and make sarcastic remarks to strangers. The Queen's Golden Gaels, on offence in particular, resembled an Ed Wood movie (or to update the reference, a bad reality show) in losing 34-13 to the No. 5-ranked Ottawa Gee-Gees at Richardson Stadium.

Some people would stop reading right here, figuring that a ranked team such as the Gee-Gees should be about 21 points better than the Gaels. This wasn't the standard instance of a powerhouse beating a struggling team by three touchdowns. Far from it. Ottawa was just so-so and was ripe for the taking, but Queen's didn't execute.

Wood was the 1950s and '60s B-movie director whose movies were so bad that they, and he, achieved a certain notoriety among movie buffs. With Canadian football, especially the university brand, you can't enjoy it without a little ironic detachment, so let it be said that by the time the final gun sounded yesterday, the Gaels had achieved a certain kind of Wood-esque grandeur. This isn't an indictment of Pat Sheahan's coaching staff and players, who had such high hopes coming into the season; it just is what is. The ability seems to be there, but each week odd coaching decisions and mental breakdowns cost the Gaels.

As noted previously, it's a semi-shame that Queen's (2-4, and amazingly still controlling its own destiny in the Ontario University Athletics playoff race) can't get their act together on offence, since the defence is playing great, even without injured all-star linebacker Ian Hazlett. The Gaels second-year quarterback, Dan Brannagan, seems lost, playing behind an offensive line that has given up few sacks but can't run block, meaning the QB is constantly in second-and-long situations. They did have some success with a 13-play drive to start the third quarter, but a pass was dropped in the end zone and they ended up missing the field goal. Ottawa scored later in the quarter to go up 24-6, and that was that.

Brannagan, last year's OUA rookie of the year has seen his passing yardage drop each week during the four-game losing skid, hitting a nadir with yesterday's 11-for-29, 59-yard showing. A person with the surname Brannagan did take home about $340 for winning the 50/50 draw, so apparently the day wasn't a total loss for the young QB's family.

Queen's longest offensive play in the game's first three quarters was on a pass from a kicker to a linebacker on a fake punt. Even their one touchdown, a 23-yarder from backup QB Ibrahim Zylstra to Brad Smith during all-over-but-the-crying time, seemed as much luck as skill, as Smith was able to grab a fluttering, underthrown ball. Zylstra, out of Brantford, is inexperienced but after seeing him go for 4-for-6 for 88 yards in garbage time, starting him against lowly York on Saturday should at least be considered.

The quarterback's stats usually reflect his blocking and his coaching. Brannagan is sixth in the country in passing yards, but that's misleading since many teams in other conferences have played one less game. In the most telling stat for quarterbacks, average yards per attempt, he's next-to-last among OUA starters, barely ahead of Waterloo's Jon Morbey, who led a last-minute drive to beat Queen's two weeks ago.

Anyway, this is not about me being a football know-it-all, or rattling off strings of statistics in a way to put the Gaels' showing in perspective. Let's just say with the trees resplendent in their fall colours and a bigger than expected crowd on hand for a Thanksgiving weekend game, it was a perfect day to go to a bad football game by yourself and make sarcastic remarks to strangers. General Jerkishness was AWOL. This was kitsch, or camp. Laughter is the best medicine when it comes to this Queen's football season.

So just a few vignettes to try to put this game in perspective. This all actually happened, and believe it or not, all within the last two minutes of the first half.

• Late in the first half, trailing just 9-3, Queen's defence stopped Gee-Gees quarterback Josh Sacobie cold on a third and goal from the 1-yard line.
  
  Taking over on their own goal line, Queen's called an option play -- a risky call at any time for a team that doesn't feature the option, let alone from your own 1-yard line. Brannagan pitched the ball a good three yards ahead of tailback Billy Burke, who had to fall on the ball for a safety.
  
  So much for the element of surprise. "Maybe that's what they were counting on," one fan remarked. "No one else has ever done it."
  
  (That was the second of four Ottawa safeties. On the last two, Queen's conceded the two points on possessions that began at their own 22- and 20-yard line)
• About a minute after the option from the 1-yard line fiasco, the Gaels recovered a fumbled punt on Ottawa's 29-yard line, I turned to a group of alumni and asked, "OK, how many yards can we safely lose here and stay in field goal range?" (Let the record show that after the Gaels gained minus-2 yards on the next two plays, Ryan Elger did hit a 39-yard knuckleball, into the wind, for the field goal.)
• Oh, and the last play of the half... it appeared the clock had run out when Queen's pulled down a scrambling Sacobie at the Gaels 43-yard-line. Nope, said the refs, Ottawa gets one more play. Not to go all Tuesday Morning Quarterback, but with only one play and the ball on the 43-yard line, would it stand to reason that Ottawa might call a Hail Mary pass?
  
  None of the Queen's defenders backed up all the way to the goal line, and Sacobie's Hail Mary was caught by David Crane for the TD. Now it was 18-6 Gee-Gees, and you could have written "game over" in your notebook.

At halftime I was talking with a Queen's fan who sees most of the games and he said it's been hard to watch the Gaels struggle, noting that they have "tons of talent." That's more damning than it sounds. Among Queen's fans, it's generally recognized that the Gaels are never going to be the most talented or physically imposing team (high admissions standards, don't you know). So it's OK if they get beat by a program that has superior athletes and a means for offering bursaries to student-athletes, but strange choices by the coaches and sloppiness on the part of the players is especially bad.

Believe it or not, the Gaels (2-4) still control their own destiny in the race for the final OUA playoff spot despite four straight losses. Beat York (1-5) this Saturday and they probably get in as the No. 6 seed, even if the Guelph Gryphons, a much more dangerous team at this point, knock off Windsor this weekend.

Queen's has the tiebreaker advantage in the event of a three-way tie with Guelph and Waterloo or a tie with Guelph in the standings. Waterloo has the advantage over Queen's, plus a season finale at home against York, so barring an upset there by the lowly Lions, playoff hopes will rest on the Western game on Oct. 21. Western, by their standards, are very beatable this year, but it may not matter.

The Gaels should probably consider themselves lucky that they beat Guelph back in Week 2 and that the Gryphons (a) lost to Laurier in OT and to Western in the final seconds (b) got the short end of the stick in scheduling since the team they don't play is lowly York.

So, for the Gaels to beat York and keep their playoff hopes alive... is that too much to ask? Even Ed Wood's movies must have had the occasional scene that he absolutely nailed.

Related:
Shakeup Saturday in the CIS (Oct. 8)
Queen's Homecoming: There's No "I" in Golden Gaels... (Sept. 16)

Back with more later (after the turkey). Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.