CIS FOOTBALL PICKS, WEEK 2

Here's some Uneducated Guesses on how Week 2 of the Canadian Interuniversity Sport football season might shake out, or more likely, how it won't shake out. Yours truly did go 7-0 on last week's picks, but hell, it was Week 1. To borrow someone else's phrase, a drunken primate could have done that. But hey, I had to make my picks while stone-cold sober.

FEATURED GAMES

#3 MONTRÉAL CARABINS vs. #1 LAVAL ROUGE ET OR
Sunday, 1 p.m., (The Score/RDS, all times Eastern)
The Battle of Quebec resumes for the first time since last November, when the Carabins narrowly lost 19-13 at Laval in the Quebec conference championship. Again, the Q is the league yours truly knows least, but it's always worth noting that Laval usually runs one of the better fall camps, and is very tough to beat to at home early in the season. Montréal is a darkhorse Vanier Cup pick, and it will get Laval on its field in the final week of the regular season. The Call: Laval 23-17.

#4 OTTAWA GEE-GEES (1-0) vs. #5 LAURIER GOLDEN HAWKS (1-0)
Saturday, 2 p.m. (The Score)
Laurier struggled on offence against Guelph, and now has to go up against a very talented Gee-Gees defence. Unless the Golden Hawks can come out plus-3 in the turnover battle and make a couple big plays on special teams, they will be very hard-pressed to keep up with Ottawa. The Call: Ottawa 27-20.

CANADA WEST

#7 MANITOBA BISONS (1-0) vs. SIMON FRASER CLAN (0-0)
Tonight, 10 p.m.
Opening against a good team that's already got a game in is never good, especially for a team coming off a winless season. Manitoba had five sacks against Regina last week, and unless SFU can protect the passer, it's in for a long night. The Call: Manitoba 31-9.

REGINA (0-1) vs. #2 SASKATCHEWAN (1-0)
Saturday, 1:30 p.m.
Think about this one for too long, and you're bound to start getting silly ideas, like the notion of the Rams pulling the upset. Then you remember Saskatchewan whipping them 57-8 last season. Regina can put up points, and U of S quarterback Bret Thompson struggled at times last week against Alberta. However, Thompson should be more settled in this week, plus the Huskies defence will pressure a Regina O-line that gave up five sacks last week. On the other side of the ball, Huskies tailback Scott Stevens could go over 200 yards. The Call: Saskatchewan 34-14.

#10 ALBERTA GOLDEN BEARS (0-1) vs. CALGARY DINOS (0-1)
Saturday, 2 p.m.
The Dinos gave UBC a scare last week. Alberta is the better team, though, and should bounce back. It's fortunate for Alberta that it has a weaker opponent; they need to figure out whether Quade Armstrong or Cameron Linke is the quarterback. Staying within 10 points will be a moral victory for Blake Nill's boys. The Call: Alberta 24-17.

ONTARIO

QUEEN'S GOLDEN GAELS (1-0) vs. GUELPH GRYPHONS (0-1)
Saturday, 2 p.m.
Question: When was the last time the Gaels beat a decent team on the road? Notwithstanding a 2004 win over an average York team when it got a second chance at a last-second field goal after the Lions return man tried to bring the ball out of his end zone and fumbled it away, it's been at least since '03. This is a critical game in Queen's bid for a playoff berth, but have to give this one to Guelph on defence and special teams strength.

Queen's has a tendency to allow the big return, and Guelph had 42- and 57-yard returns last week against Laurier. Nick FitzGibbon, who had the longer of those runbacks, also scored their TDs on 44- and 37-yard runs from scrimmage. Ultimately, this game may end up being too much of a defensive struggle for Queen's liking. The Call: Guelph 20-17.

WATERLOO WARRIORS (0-1) vs. #6 McMASTER MARAUDERS (1-0)
Saturday, 2 p.m.
The Warriors may have to wait a little longer for their first touchdown of the season. McMaster quarterback Adam Archibald is back after missing the opener due to academic issues, meaning he'll get to pad his stats before the Marauders' trip to Ottawa next week. The Call: McMaster 42-11.

U of T BLUES (0-1) vs. WINDSOR LANCERS (0-1)
Saturday, 2 p.m.
Said it before, will say it again: No, Casino Windsor is not taking bets on how fast Lancers tailback Daryl Stephenson will get to 150 yards. Stop asking, already. The Call: Windsor 47-14.

YORK LIONS (0-1) vs. WESTERN MUSTANGS (1-0)
Saturday, 7 p.m.
Isn't it nice to see the Mustangs unranked? Confession: There's a real temptation to pick Western to lose, but that could be the-grass-is-always-greener syndrome. The Mustangs aren't very good, and no one on its offence could catch the ball last week, and its defence was on the field for 36 minutes against U of Ottawa, but York has issues at quarterback -- Bart Zemanek or Mike Crabtree? -- and probably doesn't run the ball well enough or play good enough defence to hang in with the Mustangs. That said, in the past York would go into Western with maybe a 10% chance of winning; this time, it's probably in the 35-40% range. The Call: Mustangs 25-15.

QUÉBEC

CONCORDIA STINGERS vs. SHERBROOKE VERT ET OR
Tonight, 7 p.m. (RDS)
Give this one to the Stingers on experience -- they have 21 starters back and Sherbrooke will be playing rookies at quarterback. The Call: Concordia 30-13.

MCGILL REDMEN vs. BISHOP'S GAITERS
Saturday, 1 p.m.
Gaiters tailback Jamall Lee should have a big day against McGill's inexperienced defence. McGill probably has the better team in the long run, but Bishop's combo of home field and early-season enthusiasm might put them over the top if they can avoid any falling behind early and getting discouraged. The Call: Bishop's 23-20.

ATLANTIC

SAINT MARY'S HUSKIES vs. ST. FX X-MEN
Saturday, 1 p.m.
This depends on how pass-wacky SMU and quarterback Billy Robinson Jr. get in the early going and how well the host X-Men respond to it... and which St. FX team shows up. Saint Mary's often struggles on grass fields. The Call: St. FX, 34-27.

MOUNT ALLISON MOUNTIES vs. #8 ACADIA AXEMEN
Saturday, 1 p.m.
Sorry, Mount A, not this week. The Call: Acadia 38-14.

Last week: 7-0
Season record to date: 7-0
Closest call: McMaster 33-16 over York (actual score 35-17)

Related:
CIS Football Picks, Week 1 (Sept. 2)

(By the way, Sager, all the cool kids want to know: Why do you bother posting about Canadian football, or posting at all? Like your opinion matters. Stop deluding yourself. This isn't a blog -- it's a daily desperate plea for help.)

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.