Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Laugh 'cause you can't cry; Top 10 comforting thoughts after watching Canada get curb-stomped by Italy

10. Unlike Guy Carbonneau, you still had a job to go to today.

9. Don't worry, almost no one (12,411 in attendance) saw it happen.

8. Downtown Toronto bar owners still stand to reap a windfall from the Leafs and Raptors playoff runs ... in 2025.

7. Something tells us you have probably seen your last Canada Bombs Out headline in the National Post.

6. Number 10 should be valid for another two, maybe three weeks.

5. At least the coach or manager didn't spoil the game for everyone by not starting Martin Gerber ... unless Martin Gerber is Swiss-German for Scott Richmond.

4. Stubby Clapp's pity pinch-hit appearance (glove tap: The Blue Jay Hunter) allowed everyone to coo like they do with a newborn baby. Ooh, he's so cute, and he's sixty-eight inches long.

3. Grandma was able to get reacquainted with jamiecampbell -- such a nice, polite young man -- three weeks earlier than usual.

2. Everyone still has their health, especially Scott Richmond.

1. Hey, you still have as many as 78 Blue Jays wins to look forward to this summer.

Shark Sandwich (Mike Wilner, Miked Up)
Canada bombs out (National Post)
Montreal media strike again (Ottawa Sports Guy)


eyebleaf said...

I'm willing to drop money that the Jays will win more than 84 games this year.

Any takers? Come on.

Anonymous said...

Sager, Jamie Campbell was doing the broadcast? Too bad I missed that...oh wait those in Ottawa had to watch another "epic" battle between two NHL teams without a hope of playing for anything meaningful until the US cares about the WBC. Glad I was able to catch the US feed on MLB.tv Only problem they are 200 times more annoying than Jamie.

sager said...

@ eyebleaf: People probably figure you're a crafty bugger who will try to count spring training wins.

They're not gonna be as bad as everyone says thanks to pitching and fielding. Besides, the last 4-5 years have led us to the point where it's like Elaine Benes saying, "It's 3:30 in the morning, I'm at a cockfight, what am I clinging to?"

@ Anon 3:48 p.m.: Segue of the fortnight, by far. They were probably saying stuff like, "Canada is a very unique country. Their 10-dollar bill is purple, and the guy on it looks like Gene Wilder."

eyebleaf said...

I'm no crafty bugger, trust me.

84 wins. If the Jays win 84 or more, you pay me the dollar amount in wins. So 87 wins, $87. If the Jays win less than 84, I pay you the dollar amount in wins. 83 wins, and you're taking a cheque for $83 to the bank.

Spring training wins do not count, of course.

Blue Jays baseball: You gotta believe.

kinger said...

On #3, did jamiecampbell remember to wish her a happy 143rd birthday on the air?

Greg said...

Re #9: Proof positive that Toronto sports fans get what they deserve.

Sometimes I think Montreal is so, so much better.