Friday, December 19, 2008

Snark break ...

If there was a stupid and ugly award ...

The first of the NCAA's ridiculous total of 34 bowl games goes tomorrow. This is how absurd it's become: Some fans whose teams are in in a no-account bowl not only don't watch, but hope the team loses because it might help the coach get fired. When that happens, maybe it's time for a college football playoff.

Oral Roberts University's basketball press releases actually mention that Ned Flanders on The Simpsons is shown to have a diploma from the school. That's the joke.

A team in the Central Hockey League is having Carl Peterson Blame The GM Night, where anyone named Carl or Peterson gets in free. The Raptors are still doing well, so they won't be offering free tickets to anyone named Bryan.

A proverb for Florida Gators wunderkind Tim Tebow: The seas will part in college football for a white quarterback who can run, but NFL defenders close much more quickly.

Some of just prefer to loss our hair over the Minnesota Vikings in smaller increments, thank you very much: This guy once shaved his head after losing a bet on the Vikes.

The Vikings are going for a division title this weekend with Tarvaris Jackson starting at quarterback. See, there was never anything to worry about.

The No. 7 story bloggers will run into the ground today, complete with hackneyed joke construction straight out of Comedy Now reruns: "I know the Kansas City Royals can't afford to pay the big salaries, but this is ridiculous: Relief pitcher Kyle Davies actually works construction in the winter."

The next time someone in Canada starts in how Lennox Lewis turned his back on this country, you have full authority to staple this column from the Boston Herald to the knob's chest.
Lewis was ... minimized for most of his career as something less than what he turned out to be. A month ago, he was elected to the International Boxing Hall of Fame and, despite having been discounted for much of his career, it is Lewis who triumphed both in boxing and in life, two struggles that no one survives intact.

Married with two children, living happily in Miami and Jamaica with ample money and a solid job as a commentator on HBO, Lewis did what the others could not. He left before boxing made a fool of him.
Be proud that Canada helped shape Lewis, instead of crapping on him.

This post was worth nothing, but this is worth noting:
  • StubHub had a kick-ass 2008. Not all areas of the sports industry are leaking oil.
  • India's moving up the FIFA world rankings, which is a good a time as any to say that it would be great to have someone writing for this site about South Asian sports topics. The call has been put out. (Bonus points if you know any Ottawa bars that serve Kingfisher.)
  • Thanks to everyone who participated in our first live chat last night, with special thanks to Greg Hughes for putting it all together.


Dennis Prouse said...

Agreed on the ridiculous number of bowl games, although I would argue that any coach who hasn't already been canned is probably safe. The coaching carousel gets going ridiculously early now. Teams want to get an early jump on the best candidates, so if they are leaning that way they fire the coach even before the season ends (Clemson, Syracuse, Washington, etc.) so that they can start tampering with other teams' coaches, errr, I mean measuring interest in the position.

Anonymous said...

When I was a kid...many, many years ago..there was The Big Four of college bowl games.
There was the Rose, Orange, Sugar and Cotton Bowls.
All of those games were played Jan 1, and all of them had their own pageantry surrounding them.
Times have changed.
For example, the Cotton Bowl has become the American Motors of the four big bowl games.
When was the last time the Cotton Bowl had some bearing on the national championship?
Probably when Ara Parsegian was still coaching.
And the Rose Bowl's luster, despite being the grand-daddy of all bowl games, has certainly dimmed in recent years.
The biggest change tough, is that come Jan 2, we used to know who the national champion was going to be.
Not anymore.
Now, we have to wait to Jan 9 to crown the BS, er, BCS champ.
That's crap.
But then again, I always thought the US Bowl system was crap anyway.