THE BLUE JAYS COMMERCIAL CURSE

It will be official if the Blue Jays, as expected, put right-hander A.J. Burnett on the disabled list: There's a curse on any player who appears in one of those off-beat promotional commercials that the crack Jays marketing department dreams up in the dead of winter.

Every player on the current roster who's generally made an ass of himself in the name of getting the Jays' brand out there either seems to end up on the disabled list or just generally sucking. So in the name of all that is holy, can the Jays only sacrifice expendable players -- lookin' at you, Jason Phillips -- on the altar of marketing, or come up with something new? This isn't funny any more and neither is being 2 games below .500 in the middle of June.

ROY HALLADAY, PITCHER
The ad: Doc happens across a group of teenagers throwing rocks at a hornet's nest. He checks the imaginary runner, winds, throws, and knocks the nest from the branch.



The fallout: The Jays were forced to shut down Halladay due to a tender elbow last season, when the ad first ran. This season, he ended up on the DL after needing an emergency appendectomy.

TROY GLAUS, THIRD BASE
The ad: After watching a group of kids hack away at a pinata during a birthday party, Glaus steps up and knocks it out of the yard, then goes into a home-run trot.



The fallout: Hampered by a nagging heel problem, Glaus has only 11 homers so far this season. That's still good for second on the team, but this time last year, he had 20.

VERNON WELLS, CENTRE FIELD
The ad: Wells tearing off running, as if he's rounding the bases, during a children's game of hide-and-seek, eventually hiding in a dumpster.



The fallout: The ad actually ran in 2006, but in 2007, Wells' numbers are in the dumpster. With his thin and watery .723 OPS, he's on pace for his worst season since becoming an everyday player in 2002.

LYLE OVERBAY, FIRST BASE
The ad: Overbay catches the bouquet at a wedding reception and wings it at the bride, then smiles goofily before it dawns on him that was a massively uncool thing to do.



The fallout: Overbay isn't catching many bouquets these days after breaking his right hand in a game vs. the White Sox last month.

FRANK THOMAS, DESIGNATED HITTER
The ad: Thomas jumps in during a pillow fight and knocks a small boy flying. The ad was pulled since some watchdog group thought it made light of child abuse.



The fallout: Prior to his home run yesterday, that was about the most solid contact Thomas had made all season. The big man is being outslugged by Aaron Hill, a 190-pound middle infielder.

The commercial curse doesn't explain all of the Jays' woes. Leadoff hitter Reed Johnson (out until at least next month with hernia surgery) hasn't been in any commercials, and neither has closer B.J. Ryan, who had to have season-ending surgery.

Still, one hopes that Alex Rios isn't featured prominently in next season's promotional campaign.

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.