JAYS-ORIOLES: WITLESS IS BETTER THAN WINLESS

Thursday -- Jays 5, Orioles 4 (10 innings): OK, it's official. When Sam Perlozzo manages vs. John Gibbons, it's the rough equivalent of SNL's Celebrity Jeopardy sketch. You half expect either manager to get ejected for recording the third baseman's position on the lineup card as "threeve" -- a combination of three and five.

I want to punch you. Gibbons decided to rest Alex Rios and play Adam Lind and Matt Stairs at the corner outfield spots. The Jays just had two off-days and Rios is 26 years old. How tired could he be? At least Gibbons remembered to use Rios as a late-inning pinch-hitter when down a run in the eighth -- and he ended up scoring the tying run and hitting the game-winning home run. Oh, and the Jays managed to get out when Stairs flubbed a play in left field.

Simply stunning. Perlozzo brought in Danys Báez to pitch the 10th -- and he promptly coughed up the tying run. Over at Oriole Post, they ain't happy. That's a damn shame, since Leo Mazzone's reclamation project Jeremy Guthrie threw a pretty decent game.

Guthrie's now allowed just five earned runs in 28 1/3 innings since the Orioles put him in the rotation three weeks ago. That's pretty good, even when you allow that one of his starts was vs. the Washington Nationals. He also blanked the Red Sox for eight-plus innings in the instantly infamous Mother's Day Massacre game.

(UPDATE: The Tao is all over Gibbons as well, and sorry for not referencing SCTV. Explanation: That's what can happen when you weren't born until 1977 and grew up on a rural route. Just kidding.)

Wednesday -- Orioles 5, Jays 2: The crew in the Fire Mickey Brantley camp surely feel validated after a night of tentative half-swings vs. the immortal Steve Trachsel.

It's an adjustment to go from Daniel Cabrera on Tuesday to the less than overpowering Trachsel, but you could count on one hand the number of professional at-bats the Jays had in this one. There were a lot of weak first- or second-pitch outs.

It's the same gag as last year -- the Jays don't score as many runs (ninth in the AL entering tonight despite being seventh and fifth respectively in on-base and slugging averages) as they should.

Now, as for the prospect of being the set decoration for Roger Clemens' big return to the majors, thankfully it would come on Monday, same night as Game 1 of the Stanley Cup final, relegating the Rocket Man to second fiddle status inCanada. Clemens, by the way, might want a spend some more time in the minors after throwing 100-plus pitches tonight and not even getting through six innings in a Double-A game.

Tuesday -- Jays 6, Orioles 4: That A.J. Burnett does keep it interesting, eh? It was almost a rout and almost close as Burnett handed back one lead and nearly gave back another after the Jays got on Daniel Cabrera for four in the sixth and a 6-2 lead.

Aaron Hill, drawing a pair of walks to lead off innings. Nice.

Meantime, as the dudes over at The Tao noted earlier, Doc Halladay could return next week.

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.