MORE JOE BUCK? BRING IT ON

Items that distracted you from solving that mystery of who put that mud in the freezer. Who wants chocolate ice cream?

Hearing that Joe Buck is going to be the host of Fox's NFL pregame extravaganza in addition to his play-by-play duties -- meaning the master of smarmy smugness will be on the air for an extra two hours hours each Sunday -- isn't really at that infuriating. Deadspin commenters are all over this, but anyone who's a hip sports fan doesn't watch the Fox or CBS pregame shows if it can be avoided, so who cares if Joe Buck is pulling extra duty?

Let's just accept that Buck fits into a certain corporate profile so well, that we're stuck with him. Just like Ron MacLean in Canada, he's the perfect representative of flyover-country, down-home rectitude that helps sell the great unwashed to the great unwashed.

He's got a sense of humour (but really isn't funny), and knows his stuff (but isn't actually that smart), and he's got enough stories about his dad, Jack Buck, so he can do the whole meet-the-sponsors schtick without causing his bosses any headaches. Maybe it will change some day and you'll see Dane Cook or Sacha Baron Cohen hosting Fox NFL Sunday, but don't hold your breath. It is what it is.

OTHER BUSINESS

• Speaking of loving to hate sports announcers, the results of the Toronto Star's sports broadcasters survey were published today. Among the highlights: TSN's Pierre McGuire won for "the mouth most readers would like to see covered in duct tape" and Rogers Sportsnet's Mike Toth was voted most annoying anchor.
• Blue Jays-Devils Rays outlook: With Roy Halladay, Ted Lilly and A.J. Burnett as the scheduled starters against Tampa Bay, nothing but a sweep will do this week. Burnett. vs. Scott Kazmir on Thursday is probably the best pitching matchup in the majors that day.
• Off Wing Opinion and James Mirtle each have good posts up on Evgeni Malkin going MIA from his Russian team. Mirtle's summary of how this will likely play out seems highly probable.
• The all-new Cracked magazine launches today at 9 a.m. Eastern. It may be the most important thing ever to happen in the digital world, or in the real world. There's also a nine-page ESPN parody, although their list of the best '80s movies girlfriends is worth a read. But where's Ione Skye's character in Say Anything?

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.