Monday, October 01, 2007

NFC NORRIS: A CHILDRESS CATASTROPHE

Hey, it's not like we depend on this for our self-worth. Good thing, too.

  • Brett Favre setting a career record on the Vikings home field, one can live with. It's harder to get past feeling like Vikes coach Brad Childress, with Fox showing the game, must have intended his gameplan to be a homage to Joe Buck, since he blew it worse than Buck ever has while talking about Ol' No. 4. (Or Derek Jeter, might as well feed two birds with one scone.)

    (UPDATE: And, on cue, Sports Illustrated's Peter King is touting Favre for MVP, because, Ol' No. 4's wife suggested it. Is it just cruel to point out Favre is 17th in the league in yards-per-pass?)

    Adrian Peterson might as well have gone and joined his namesake on the Bears for all the Vikes used him in the second half. Quoth Kissing Suzy Kolber:

    "You see the big strong kid wearing #28 over there on the bench? You know, the one who averaged 11 yards a carry on the afternoon? The guy who only got 2 carries in the second half? The only good player on your offense? The one you apparently assume is made of peanut brittle? The only thing about this season that's keeping me from drinking a gallon of rubber cement? THE ONE YOU HAD RETURNING KICKS LIKE HE WAS DAVID F---ING PALMER? Here's a wild idea for you: GIVE PURPLE JESUS THE F---ING ROCK, YOU STUPID BALD F---!"
  • The most dangerous place in the Metrodome during the Packers' win over the Vikings was between Favre and a Fox cameraman after either of his TD passes. Relax. He's only keeping this record warm for six, maybe seven years until Peyton Manning obliterates it, probably in a lot fewer attempts and with fewer interceptions.
  • The Vikings offence has run 250 plays this season and scored four touchdowns. Daunte Culpepper passed or ran the ball 19 times in his first start for the Raiders and accounted for five TDs. You know there's guys in Minneapolis calling lawyers to see if your wife saying, "Isn't that the guy who used to be the quarterback for the Vikings?" is grounds for divorce.
  • Throw in Culpepper, Childress and the anticipation of Randy Moss probably ending up with something like eight catches for 155 yards and three touchdowns (two receiving, one as a passer or ballcarrier on some trick play) in the Monday nighter and it was impossible to enjoy the Bears giving up 34 points in the fourth quarter and losing the Lions. Chicago columnist Steve Rosenbloom's sum-it-all-up for how bad it is for a Chicago Bears fan: "Chianti, and forget the glass."

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.

1 comment:

Tyler King said...

"Favre is 17th in the league in yards-per-pass"

Because that's how Mike McCarthy's offence has always worked. Short completions are not evil.

Besides, who bases their MVP voting on that statistic?