BATTER UP: TAMPA BAY DEVIL RAYS

Counting down the seconds till Opening Day when life begins anew involves providing a "starting nine" for all 29 major-league teams, plus the Tampa Bay Devil Rays.

1. Can you take a mulligan on an entire decade? You know how you go back to your hometown, go out to a bar and run into someone from high school? Within a couple minutes, you confirm that he's just as you left him. He still lives at home. He still doesn't know what he wants to do with his life. He still drinks Molson's and still dates 19-year-olds, which you didn't even do when you were 19.
   
   That's the Rays. As Batter's Box noted, they're threatening to be the first American League team to lose 90-plus games 10 years in a row; in '06, they lost two more games than they did in their first season, 1998. The analogy also fits since on TV, Tropicana Field does project the dank ambience of the average parents' basement.
   
   The new owners still can't even find a uniform or nickname -- Rays or Devil Rays, which is it? -- and the franchise is even worth $16 million less than it was after its first season, Sports teams can actually lose value. Who knew?
2. Nevertheless... Ignore the second half of 2006, when it took almost heroic levels of suckitude -- a 3-33 road record -- to catch the Royals for the worst record in baseball. Tampa Bay GM Andrew Friedman cleared out the stables with a mid-season fire sale, so the cupboard was pretty bare.
   
   DRaysBay has pointed out the Rays hitters are trying to improve their plate discipline, which was a big part of the Tigers' turnaround in 2006 (until the World Series). The pitching has nowhere to go but up, but a lot rests on the shoulder of lefty Scott Kazmir.
3. Sunny Rays: Internet nerds (present company included) are salivating over the Rays' future like leaked topless photos of Jennifer Aniston, and why the hell not? The Rays are just marking time until Evan Longoria and Reid Brignac take over the left side of the infield. The right side might soon include hotshot B.J. Upton, who hit .303/.392/.490 with 98 runs scored in Triple A in 2005 and is trying second base on for size. Between Carl Crawford (pictured) in left, Rocco Baldelli in centre and Triple-A stars Elijah Dukes and Delmon Young, the Rays have four of the best outfielders under the age of 26 in baseball.
4. When someone called the Rays a Mickey Mouse outfit, they took it literally: Tampa Bay has moved its May 15-17 series vs. the Rangers to the Disney's Wide World of Sports Complex (capacity 9,500) in Orlando. It seems kind of appropriate for a team which lost 13 games in a row this spring. During that run, prize pickup Akinori Iwamura, the Japanese third baseman, endured a 1-for-22 slump.
5. How bad was their hitting in '06? Based on his stats, Crawford created 100 runs, but scored only 89. That's a lot of standing out at second base at the end of the inning while a batboy runs out with your cap and glove.
   
   Now let us never speak of the 2006 Rays season again, especially the youthful indiscretions which involved Upton, Dukes and Young last year in Triple A. (Dukes was sent home after clashing with his manager, Upton was arrested for drunk driving and Young was suspended 50 games for striking an umpire.) Let's be positive.
6. Josh Hamilton... we have no recollection: The Rays would rather not be reminded of the sad saga of outfielder Josh Hamilton, the No. 1 overall pick in the 1999 draft who fell into drug addiction. Hamilton, who's only 25, is by all accounts is clean and sober, hitting .400 in spring training and might start in right field on Opening Day -- but for the Cincinnati Reds, not the Rays.
   
   He's not even the biggest bust in Rays history. In 1997, it lavished a $10.2 million bonus on high school pitcher Matt White -- who never made the majors and was so fragile that he missed the 2000 Olympics after being injured on Team USA's flight to Australia.
7. Retro Ray: The Crime Dog, Fred McGriff (first base, 1998-2001, 2004), gets the nod not so much for what he did in the winddown portion of his career with his hometown ballclub, but what he did with the Blue Jays about a decade earlier.
   
   McGriff had a curious career; it never seemed like he put up the numbers people expected. He won home run titles in both leagues, but never hit 40 in a season and finished short of 500 for his career (493), which won't do a lot to convince the numbskulls who vote for the Hall of Fame. As a lefty-hitting, lefty-throwing slugger with the Jays from 1987-90, though, he gave a young redheaded kid someone to identify with.
   
   If McGriff does enter the Hall of Fame, it would be really interesting to see which team he represents -- he never played more than four full seasons with any club.
8. Will the Trop ever see a playoff game? Don't be negative -- it did in 1996 when it was called the Thunderdome and the NHL's Tampa Bay Lightning played there.
9. Need-to-know: There's nowhere to go but up. Crawford is one of the game's best leadoff hitters and will be a complete player, save for a weak throwing arm, once he improves his walk rate.
   
   The Devil Rays were better than last season's 61-101 record -- their run differential suggests they should have improved all the way to 65-97. So can the pitching and hitting inch forward enough for Tampa to crack the mythical 89-loss barrier? Ask again in 2008.

That's all for now. Send your thoughts to neatesager@yahoo.ca.