FOOKING BRILLIANT

39 years ago today, the Leafs won their last Stanley Cup. And people howled that they couldn't believe the playoffs were now carrying into May. On with the show:

Daily Kos has the transcript of Stephen Colbert tearing the Bush White House a new one at the correspondents' dinner. Gems include but are not limited to:

• "Somebody pinch me. You know what? I'm a pretty sound sleeper -- that may not be enough. Somebody shoot me in the face. Is he really not here tonight? Dammit. The one guy who could have helped."
• 'By the way, Senator McCain, it's so wonderful to see you coming back into the Republican fold. I have a summer house in South Carolina; look me up when you go to speak at Bob Jones University."
• "Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash."
• "Fox News gives you both sides of every story: the president's side, and the vice president's side."

Thanks to Greg for directing me. Now here's sports:

NHL PLAYOFFS DAY 11

• OILERS 4 RED WINGS 3 (Edmonton wins 4-2): Huzzah for the fooking brilliant Oilers! Too bad they couldn't have dragged it to a Game 7 back in Dee-troit, thereby prompting Mitch Albom to do his once-a-year column on hockey. That makes the big winners in this series Dwayne Roloson, Craig MacTavish and the entire Detroit Free Press readership. Did the Oilers really erase two Red Wings leads in the third period? Did they really win after trailing with five minutes left? Yea gods. And yes, this will be Stevie Y's last game. Confession: I passed on this to go see The Rocket at the theatre. I regret nothing. Any movie where you see L.A. Kings meathead Sean Avery (who is cast against type as a New York Rangers meathead) get punched in the face three times is cheap at twice the price.
• DUCKS 2 FLAMES 1 (Series tied 3-3): So, if Anaheim wins on Wednesday, fifth seed San Jose will have home-ice advantage for the second and third rounds. My one comment here is this has been a hard series to get into unless you have friends or family employed by either team. Sure, it's intense, but at some point there has to be some freakin' offence. Fittingly, Anaheim's winning goal was actually scored by Calgary d-man Rhett Warrener, who had Scott Niedermayer's centring pass deflect off his leg and into the net. Prediction for Game 7: First goal wins. Calgary's the better team, but you would figure they would have proved it by now and finished off Anaheim. Still, I stand by the Flames on goaltending and experience.

DAY 12 LOOK AHEAD

• 7 p.m., 'CANES AT HABS (Carolina leads 3-2): The Canadiens are DUI. I mean DOA. I always get those two mixed up. Cam Ward is the story of the series, and so are the Habs forwards who haven't challenged the young 'Canes netminder. The Habs look every bit like a beaten bunch.
• 7 p.m., SABRES AT FLYERS (Buffalo leads 3-2): Two words: young legs. Buffalo's got 'em. Philly, not so much. I doubt any team's won a playoff series where it allowed the first goal in every game, which is what Philly has done so far. Buffalo's ready to finish this off tonight, let's say with a 4-2 win. Bank it.

OTHER BUSINESS

• How about those Blue Jays? Troy Glaus goes yard twice in a 9-7 win over the Orioles. They look to sweep tonight when Casey Janssen makes his second big-league start against Anna Benson's husband.
• Question: are the people snapping up Reggie Bush No. 5 New Orleans Saints jerseys doing so because they figure they'll have a collector's item when the NFL makes their predictable ruling that he has to conform to the league's numbering system? They haven't bent the rule for anyone, and I doubt they ever will.

See you after the games tonight.